❊ It’s Not Because Men Are Threatened by You, It’s Because The Competition Is Tough

I just read an article in Now Lebanon by Aline Sara about Lebanese women and the marriage market. While I perfectly sympathise with the Lebanese woman’s difficulty in finding a spouse, I think someone has to express the male point of view and I’m stepping forward.

I find what some of these women are saying to be very patronizing. They are rationalizing why they’re being passed over by making general assertions like Lebanese men are “threatened” by female success. Here’s “Nayla” from Jounieh:

Perhaps they are worried about my earnings, or they feel threatened. They claim they are open-minded and want the woman to be free. But very often, it is not the case. They might have a problem accepting that we are equally successful.

While I do concede that some men think like that, it’s absurd to think that this is the general rule. And yet you find this mantra repeated by many, many, women, as if it were some sort of generally accepted wisdom.

I am a Lebanese man and my wife is a head of department in a university. Am I threatenned by her success? Hell no. I’m happy for her and she makes me proud.

The real reason why it’s difficult for Lebanese women to find spouses is spelled out right there in the first paragraph: The 1/6 men to women ratio (which I find exaggerated and unscientific, but that’s another topic).
 It’s a tough market out there, and men are -rationally- exploiting this to be choosy. If the roles were reversed, I can easilly imagine a scenario where men write articles about men who complain of being passed over because “all women like tall men” or “rich men” or men with “big cars”.

–
Note: Posts with titles starting with an ❊ (asterisk) are my opinion and article posts. I used this system to separate long posts from quick links and comments.